An elegant way to apologize for everything so wrong yet so right


The 5 People You Meet at Mardi Gras

Posted March 1, 2014 by in DRUNK

Get your King cake ready, grab some beads, and get ready for an all-day drinkfest – it’s Mardi Gras time! As one of the biggest parties on the planet takes center stage, we want everyone to get ready for the celebration.

Since we can’t duplicate the madness that’s going on in NOLA right now, the best we can do is show off the five people that you’d definitely meet had you been there. After seeing some of these people, you may want to rethink ever going to the Big Easy.

Old People: It’s only natural that old people show up everywhere you seem to be. It doesn’t matter if it’s the local pub or the big game, they always seem to find out where the fun’s going on. Mardi Gras is absolutely no different. They will be there, they will drink, and those old bones will probably outlast your sorry ass!

Perverts: There isn’t a better feeding ground for these guys than Mardi Gras. You’ll see them trying to fit in by wearing something a little bit too revealing for their own good, while rocking tons of beads to toss to chicks. When you get one of these folks around alcohol and boobs, something bad’s bound to happen. Do we really need to remind you to avoid them at all costs? Didn’t think so…

Hot Chicks: They’re the staple of the event, really making it what it is. Every college dude goes to try and hook-up with one of these chicks. Problem is, most of ‘em are married or hired models who are getting it in with someone that has way more pull than you do. The good thing is, it’s free to look at them – which we all know isn’t a bad consolation prize.

Weirdos: You’ll find them absolutely sideways drunk, slurring whatever crazy shit they have on their mind. Are they fun? Sure, they can be. But get a little too close to them, and you’ll have both a clinger who thinks they’re you’re best friend, or a hookup that you’ll regret, hoping to forget before anyone else finds out about it.

Townies: Just like any college campus, Mardi Gras boasts plenty of true hometown supporters, that have been doing this for way too long. These are the people you really want to drink with because they’ll hook you up with free drinks, tell you exactly where to go, and intro you to the people to make it the most memorable (and forgettable) night of your entire life. Play nice with these types, and you may just be the Grand Marshal in next year’s parade!

20_0fd6aWant to show how much you party? Check out our store and start apologizing appropriately for last night’s shenanigans.


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