Places to Avoid During Spring Break
Spring Break is pretty much here, so if you haven’t booked everything already, you better get on it now.
But while there’s tons of places to go on and get hammered on Spring Break, there are far more places not to avoid going to during a week off, and these are just a few of them.
Do: The Resort
The resort is the common destination of all Spring Breaks, regardless of where you go. It’ll be beautiful, the grounds around it stunning, and the booze dirt cheap. Oh, and it goes without saying they’ll be enough eye candy to fill your sweet tooth.
Don’t: Anything outside the Resort
The kind people in the hotel will tell you not to leave the resort. Ever. At all. Don’t do it. And guess what? They’re right. You go off the grounds, you’re a target. The resort might be pretty, but there’s a reason a huge wall surrounds it… to keep the uninvited guests out.
Do: Somewhere Warm
This is obvious. A lot of us, including myself, go to school up north, where warm weather happens only at the start, and end of the school year. Spring Break’s supposed to be fun – so do yourself a favor and go somewhere where you come back looking more like Snooki than that dude from Powder.
Don’t: Somewhere Cold
Even Shaun White would say he’d do beaches over snow for Spring Break. Winter’s great and all, but not on Spring Break. So Canada, Colorado, Eastern Europe as a whole… no thanks.
Do: Somewhere Fun
You go to college for four to eight years of your life. After that, you work until you basically keel over. Take advantage of this knowledge, and go somewhere cool – all while raging your face off.
Don’t: Alternative Spring Break
Like I said above, you have four years of college. Now people that go on alternative Spring Break are making a difference and helping and all that shit, but would you rather build houses in a malaria infested civil war dominated country, or would you rather party your face off in Mexico? Hmmm… I think I’ll take Senor Frogs every time.
Don’t: That place in Piranha
Now I saw this movie because I knew it would be laughably bad, but I had a few problems with it. The main one being, who the fuck goes on Spring Break to a lake? That just reeks of last second planning and cheaping out on something better. Don’t go half-ass Spring Break, or you may get devoured by piranhas.
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