An elegant way to apologize for everything so wrong yet so right

 
 
 
 
 


End of the World Survival Guide

2
Posted August 14, 2012 by in DRUNK

So we’ve all heard the rumors about how the Mayans predicted 2012 as being the end of the world. And although it may seem a little early to start stashing away food and building panic rooms, it’s steadily creeping up on us.

We feel like you can never be overprepared, so here’s a list of things you’re going to need to stock up on before the end of the world, which just might happen in time to wipe out Finals Week!

 

Your Body Weight in Alcohol. No, it’s not to share, you have to be sure that when the world finally comes to an end, you are so inebriated that you’re saying, “Cheers to the fucking night!”

 

No Pants. You’re not going to be alive tomorrow, so have all the sex you want, and don’t even bother taking the time to put your pants back on. Just tap it, and leave it!

 

A Lifetime Supply of Big Macs. Fuck the calories, you’re gonna be the last motherfucker to EVER eat McDonald’s, so take in one of the tastiest sandwiches known to mankind… while there still is a mankind.

 

A List of the People You Really Hate. Once you’re at a good level of drunken and disorderly conduct, start calling each and every one of these pricks to tell them exactly why they need to go blow themselves.

 

A Puppy. You’ve always wanted one, so take advantage of the one thing that will be with you all night, loving you even through all your drunken escapades.

 

Twelve Gallons of Chocolate Syrup. If you really want to send the end of the world out with a bang, call the ladies and start pouring chocolatey delight on every single thing you want to eat!

 

20_0fd6aVisit our store and enter “STAV55″ at checkout and get 25% OFF your entire order!


2 Comments



Leave a Response