Drunkass Dispatch of the Week: Pippa Pops It Off!

It’s no secret that the UK knows how to party. Between their love for pubs, banger and mash, and lad mags, it’s a complete shitshow when you get a couple accented-hooligans together for a night of debauchery.

For normal people like ourselves, that’s all good and fine, but when you’re looked at as royalty as Pippa Middleton is, things get a little more dicey and publicized.

After a night of boozing it up in Paris, Pip’s in the news for some racy pics of her with a nearly naked nun (nice), a dwarf (a definite partying necessity), and a dude rocking a dog collar (S&M’s always in, right?)

Sources say it’s hard on Pippa for “having all the downside (to her sister’s royalty), yet no upside,” but if you’re making news for partying, we really don’t feel bad for you.

Since we’re always on the hunt for finding our own Pippa (in America, we call her Lindsay Lohan), we slam some shots for all of our dwarf-loving, leather and laced friends.

Want to show how much you party? Check out our store and start apologizing appropriately for last night’s shenanigans.