An elegant way to apologize for everything so wrong yet so right


BILLY BOY’s “Just the Tip”: The Morning After: You Screwed Your Roommate

Posted February 1, 2012 by in SEX

We aren’t referring to the time you took the last of your roommate’s milk for your morning bowl of Fruit Loops. We’re talking about the fact that you just broke the cardinal rule, ‘thou shalt not shit where thou sleeps’.

There’s a couple different ways this could go, but most importantly, you two horny bunnies are going to sit down and hash this out ASAP. Certain things can be swept under the rug, but after taking your roommate to Pound Town, you need to know where you stand. Is it a one-night stand, friends with benefits or possible relationship? BILLY BOY helps you try and sort it out…

One Night Stand: The average person would want to avoid any awkward interactions, so some would agree that having “the talk” as soon as you’ve blown your load is best. However, given it’s your roommate, you might want to take a little bit of a delicate approach: Give it the night, and talk first thing in the morning. State your terms loud and clear. It was unexpected, and while amazing, it’s not a good idea for it to happen again.

Beneficial Roomie: So you and your roommate do the deed, and then you each go to your respective beds. Maybe you’re both single, or maybe one of you is actually taken. Regardless of your status, you can’t sleep because you had a taste of something you liked, and now the only thing on your mind is: I want some more of that!

First, test the waters and see how the other person feels. After all, if there’s going to be any benefiting at all, you require the other person’s approval. If the desire’s not actually mutual, then you’ve got to move on, and learn to respect your roommate’s space. Give the person a few days of breathing room before you try to get back to normal.

Now if the response to the suggestion is positive, then you two must set some boundaries. Both parties need to be clear on what’s allowed and what’s not. After that, it’s all fun and games!

Possible Relationship: So you banged your roommate, and now you’ve discovered that you have deeper feelings for them. Honestly, now’s a good time to freak out. Go to the bar with your buddies while you get yourself together. You need to have a conversation, using your head – the one above your shoulders.

If your roommate doesn’t share the same feelings, then don’t flash your cards all at once. If you’re both in a good mood, and you happened to have a great time, keep it light for a while. See if it’s in the other person’s intention to give it a try, and have a possible attraction towards you. Oh, and don’t be a pussy. Ask them out! A simple, “Hey, I just want to see where this goes.”

Bad Idea: Well, worse things have happened. There’s going to be plenty of shame walking around the apartment, not being able to talk about it at once. And for those who do talk about it before being ready to have such a talk, expect an argument for no reason.

The best thing to do is calm down, and see it for what it is, a passing moment of passion. Human beings are full of emotions, and they aren’t always channeled in the best ways. Once you’re comfortable, sit down and try to hash it out. It’s bad, but it’s not nearly as terrible as the time you hooked-up with your ex!

Have you seen our new shirts yet? Check out our store and start apologizing appropriately for last night’s shenanigans – even if we all know you’re really not that sorry!


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